How To Choose Pallbearers for a Funeral

A very personal aspect of funeral planning is choosing pallbearers, as they are usually the people who were closest to the deceased during their lifetime. Losing a loved one is devastating for those left behind – physically, emotionally, and psychologically.

Having planned your funeral in advance ensures that your loved ones are better prepared for this life-changing event during a time of confusion and grief, drawing comfort from knowing that your last wishes are honored and fulfilled. Let's review the meaning and role pallbearers play at a funeral, and the details you need to consider when choosing pallbearers.

How To Choose Pallbearers

Many people consider it an honor to be selected for this role and will most likely accept; however, discuss your request with them before finalizing your funeral plans. Your relationships with family and friends will probably determine whom you choose as pallbearers. However, there are specific practicalities you should keep in mind.

For example, will they be able to attend the funeral if they have to travel from far away? Do they understand and agree to accept the responsibilities of pallbearers, and finally, do they possess the necessary physical capacity?

What Is an Honorary Pallbearer?

Choosing pallbearers can be difficult, especially if you have an extended family and many friends. For this reason, there are two types of pallbearers: Active pallbearers and honorary pallbearers. Active pallbearers carry the coffin or casket and can be your immediate family members, such as children, siblings, and other close family members. Honorary pallbearers can be close-knit friends, elderly family members who aren't strong enough to hold the coffin, or someone you wish to receive special recognition for the role they played in your life. Honorary pallbearers don't usually carry the coffin or casket, but instead walk behind the active pallbearers.

How Many Pallbearers Are Needed?

In most cases, you won't need more than four to six pallbearers to carry a coffin or casket for an adult of average size. Generally, the number of pallbearers depends on the size and weight of the coffin or casket. It also depends on the distance they have to walk.

Planning your funeral and making arrangements ahead of time makes it easier for your loved ones when the time comes, and allows you to recognize and honor the people who meant most to you during your life. It’s an act of love so that everyone has the opportunity to say goodbye in the way they most need it.